Tuesday, 5 February 2008

I love dancing with women

In the first part of my regular class tonight I danced several times with a woman who's taking the improvers' class as a leader. She leads beautifully and is more and more fun to dance with every week. She likes dancing with me, too, so we cheated a little bit and got each other more often than was strictly fair.

Some people don't like dancing with a woman leading. I don't know why, because they're usually rather good - it's much easier to learn to lead well if you've had the opportunity to learn to follow first. So many of the problems have already been dealt with. It's not an absolutely reliable rule, and the slighter physique can present its own problems with the embrace, but they're not more severe than any of the more routine problems, just different. I have lots of fun dancing with women and will happily give it a go with any woman who asks me socially. Quite apart from enjoying the dance for itself, there's also the high probability that we'll make each other look good, and the additional feature of inspiring men who can dance to split us up. In my view, anyway. I don't know whether the same advantages are there for the woman leading. A few men are reluctant to dance with women who lead.

Anyway, this is mostly an excuse to post this, which is a really nice milonga performance from Moscow:

Arranging two pairs of tits can be a puzzle to the inexperienced, but the puzzlement is momentary. If they're small, it's not really an issue. Even if you're exactly the same height, a swift adjustment will easily put one pair above and the other below. If they're big, it still only damps the signal if they're allowed to move from side to side, and any well-fitting bra will solve that problem. I know one teacher who just leads with hers (no other strategy, in her case, is possible) and her lead is perfectly clear.


Anonymous said...

I think men look good dancing together .. the power and fire of two big men .. constrained (just) by the disciplines of the tango ... shame most men are too scared to do it.

msHedgehog said...

That would be cool too. But I think I might be tempted to watch in a mirror or peep over my fan (why? Don't answer that).

koolricky said...

Hi mshedgehog. I also love dancing with women and I am not trying to be cheeky here! I find a woman's lead very curious. It's so different than a man's! They smoother, more caring and sweeter than man. A women's lead can be soooo tender!
I like following but, to be very honest with you, I prefer to follow with a women leading than with a man!

koolricky said...

woman instead of women in tha last sentence, sorry!

msHedgehog said...

Kookricky, you can be pretty sure that a woman is going to respect your balance and not try to throw you around, if only because she does not have the power or leverage to dance in any other way. That makes a difference. But I think learning to follow first really helps too.

koolricky said...

It does! That is why I started to learn following. It added a completely different dimension to my dance!

La Nuit Blanche said...

that's silvina vals! now located in new york, and partnered (in dance and life) to oliver kolker. i love her -- the way she dances and teaches, and the sweet smile with which she greets me everytime i see her out in the milongas. :)

i love dancing with women too. i am slowly collecting a number of leading ladies to my dancecard every week -- there are now three with whom i dance on a regular basis.

and you're right -- the initial discomfort at arranging the bewbies was gone after the first few dances. now i clasp onto women as naturally as i melt into men.

have you noticed that women leaders (even the ones just starting out in leading) are incredibly smooth in a way only the best male leaders are?

msHedgehog said...

@Nuit - yes, they are smooth. I wonder if when a man's lead seems rough, it is often because he simply hasn't got full control of his own balance, so for example he can't rotate on the spot without writhing or wobbling. And because of his greater mass and width, even quite small problems with his balance feel very rough to a female follower. Whereas the women have already learned to pivot on the toes of one foot without wobbling, and compensate for all sorts of suprises, before they go to all the trouble of learning to lead.